memorial day desecrated by W, aka "shitball"

supposed to hit the 90's today on parts of the east coast. gas prices are high. w is concerned. his solution: drill more wells. burn more fuel. pay lip service to "alternative energy" so bux can go into the pockets of r & d asshole buddies of his. drill in the wildlife refuges. keep on drivin'. produce more. don't conserve. wage a war for oil that drives prices high while calling for more consumption in a nation trapped in an internal combustion cage. 90's on the east coast. a little tongue flick from the flames of hell-to-come fanned by armaggeddon man, aka w, aka killer klown, aka shitball. shitball will lay a wreath at the graves of dead soldiers and call for more soldiers to die. he is expected to call for more "sacrifices." while he makes none. never has, never will. sacrifices. sacrifices to the god of oil, of consumption, of profit. burnt and blasted offerings to his silver-lined way of life. so that he and his may never have to sacrifice a fucking thing. today w will desecrate graves by his mere presence. he will not honor the war dead. if he would honor them, he would stay the fuck away from the so-called hallowed grounds. he would not call for more to die in vain. his presence will piss on the memory of those he has killed. killed with his own hand. holding his fountain pen filled with blood. signing death warrants.

so many have been sacrificed by bush. in the name of democracy. rory lays a tear at the grave of all who have died. all those burned, blown apart, blasted by shitball the madman. a tear for the soldier. a tear on the grave of the unknown child. a tear on the graves being dug by shitball's shovelmen of death as these words are typed. memorial day. the world will never forget the scourge of this shitball. the scars will be there for the finger of memory to read -- the Braille of sorrow -- until all humanity has died.

what if spanky turned out to be innocent? And some further questions about the 5' 1" alleged sex offender furor

okay. first time rory saw this pick, he immediately thought ronald had done something "bad." why else would the cops be takin' him away like this:



from that day on, perhaps unconsciously, rory thought of ronald mcdonald as a criminal. but rory never learned the full story. were the officers merely helping a drunken clown out of the park? was ronald falsely accused of something? was he ultimately cleared? i dunno. but this picture lives on. it's still on the 'net. a reminder among other things of why allowing photos of the "perp walk" can prejudice a person's ability to get a semblance of a fair shake in the amerikan justice system. no follwup out there. the arrest and carting off of ronald was the story. the moment. the visual byte. the seller. minds moved on for the next stim. and ronald's rep was forever in the shitcan at least with those who saw this image.

so today rory wonderz about spanky the clown as well.


spanky was a bigtime bigtop clown. worked for ringling. spanky got busted for kiddie porn. shocking, huh? spanky was pretty much presumed guilty. you can surf the web and find many accounts of his arrest. but it ain't so easy to find out what happened later. in fact, rory searched for awhile, but roryz attention span became an issue and he dropped the investigation of "whatever happened to spanky?" maybe someday. not motivated enough today. fuckit. clowning is enough of a crime. no tears for the clown. so, the idea is implanted in roryz head that spanky lives up to his name when he sees naked kids. fuckit, unless there's a major spanky exoneration story, many of us will always define spanky by the moment of his arrest and his lasting internet fame. spanky's moment. spanky's frickin' "immortality."

do people get locked up for sex crimes they didn't commit. they sure as shit do. easy to forget that fact. for all of us. good fact to remember, even if it's unpleasant and makes things complicated. screws up the urge for black and white. good versus evil. good is frickin' evil when it punishes the innocent. and the story in the link is a frickin' happy ending story. release after 6.5 years in the joint. 6.5 years in the reviled status of rapist. always the chance of a shank. a beating. being locked down in a small ill ventilated metal and stone box in the heat of the summer knowing it's for life 'cause nobody will listen to the con who says "I'm innocent." but the dude discussed in the link had some dna evidence to save him. but for that he'd still be in the joint. doomed to die in the joint. simple as frickin' that.

can happen to anybody.

in a former life rory spent many hours behind bars with all sorts of merely accused and all kinds of guilty naked apes of the indigent sort. when you represent the indigent you don't pick 'n' choose your cases. met plenty of innocent people whose lives were fucked over by the system. more than most would want to believe. met plenty of guilty ones. came to really hate dealing with guilty child molesters. a little epiphany came one day when a tiny man, probably about 5' tall, with a turkey-neck, was bitching to me about being convicted of "aggravated" sodomy with a little girl. he had one of those names could be either gender, like Lynn. he didn't understand that the term "aggravated" was due to her tender age. he spoke of how she was seductive and a willing participant. i wanted to puke. i could literally feel puke rising in my throat. i pretty much wanted to puke on him. then i stopped hearing what he was saying. he was totally demented with thoughts fractured in a brain turned to crystals reflecting damaged thoughts around like funhouse mirrors distorting reality. talking about how he taught the child about "man's milk." i stopped hearing him. i wanted to jump across the table and break his neck and beat him. rip his jugular out with my teeth. obviously i didn't. i would've been put in jail for that. and would've sickened myself. but i felt like it. but i knew that was wrong. that guy was clearly guilty by his own admission and other overwhelming evidence ('cause I gotta point out in passing that there are plenty who "confess" even when it ain't true). but it still would've been wrong. would've solved nothing. who would i have been? just because i knew he was guilty would that have been justification? rory the one man lynch mob. nope. that wasn't gonna happen. but we all have a lynch mob hiding somewhere in our heads with the potential to pick up the torches and ropes and surround our reason, 'specially when it comes to child molesters, rapists, killers of children. but we must never go there. once we go there. then there is no hope of justice. the innocent will hang along with the guilty and we will perpetuate brutality. don't get me wrong. one dead human don't mean shit in the grand cosmic scheme of things. death ain't much, really. but we gotta try to live as well as possible in the meantime. vengeance avoids the real issues. the underlying issues. the story and the emphasis is always on punishment. much more so than on helping those hurt. and when we become all about anger and vengeance we help perpetuate forgetfulness about the real issues. and that's bullshit. now I'm frickin' ramblin' and that means it's almost time to stop. but I got just a coupla questions.

why is there a clamor to put this guy in conditions worse than guantanamo even as we condemn guantanamo?
granted he looks like a kiddie diddler. [rory doesn't know the actual conditions of the joint the judge had to consider or know whether the judge's concerns were legit, but rory refers to commentary and outrage all over seeming to say the little guy should be thrown in the joint, butt fucked, beaten, tortured and killed]. For those who have missed it, this is the guy who got probation and is 5' 1" tall. All over the 'net it's being put out that the judge put him on probation for some sexual contact with 12 year old instead of locking him up because he is short and would be unsafe. Here's one of them "fair and balanced" accounts. rory wasn't there. not sure if that was the full rationale. maybe it was. maybe it is wrong. maybe there's a right to appeal a sentence in Nebraska. I dunno. but I don't think we should beat the shit out of the little guy. or castrate him. or such like ideas that are sweeping the 'net as the electronic lynch mob lights up its torches. coupla examples: bad things happening in prison or vigilante justice and shooting in the back of the head chinese style

oh yes. rory knowz. he's a child molester, he don't deserve no better. but all the people in abu ghraib and guantanomo are terrorists, right? wake the frick up amerika and look in the frickin' mirror. you think the brutal prison conditions that've gotten so much publicity are an aberration? an accident? plenty of amerikans seem to want prisons like that. some of 'em even got to act out their desires in the military. yep plenty want such prisons until there's a chance they might wind up there themselves. like the short dude in question. should the dog handlers of abu gharib have dogs biting their naked shit- smeared balls in the brig? or should we try to stop the cycle, even if it is ultimately an exercise in futility in this land of the most violent naked apes walking the planet.

what if the short dude were innocent? I for one sure as shit will never trust the press to accurately determine guilt or innocence? if we can't keep the truly guilty safe in prison, how will we keep the innocent safe? how will we keep the 5'1" 17 year old who was convicted of theft safe? who in the system of justice do you trust enough to have the power of life and death and always get it right? maybe alberto gonzales? fuck no. lock 'em up if they're guilty of dangerous crime as best as can be told. but there's an obligation to have a safe and humane place to keep them. and by the way, "them," could be any one of us on a given day, falsely identified, or falsely accused for some other reason. there are plenty of joes out there and will be more (see they sure as shit do link above for an example if you haven't already).

nekked apes sure are a troubled species.

meanwhile, rory wonderz what the fuck happened to spanky.

irrepressible

roryshockz joining the irrepressible campaign. the dynamic button added to roryz sidebar shows fragments of censored content and gets you to the campaign page where you can "take action." you can grab the code for the dynamic button there, too. format looks good on my machine. pls lemme know if its effed up atall on yours. rory signed this pledge, as well:

"I believe the Internet should be a force for political freedom, not repression. People have the right to seek and receive information and to express their peaceful beliefs online without fear or interference. I call on governments to stop the unwarranted restriction of freedom of expression on the Internet -- and on companies to stop helping them do it."

its worth exploring around amnesty's materials after you get to where you need to go to sign the pledge by clicking the button. there's info 'bout a variety of things including Shi Tao, whom yahoo sold out. the dude's doin' 10 years for sending out info about instructions from the chinese government directing news outlets to shitcan coverage of tiananmen square anniversary demos. he's doin' forced labor and his wife is being harrassed, interrogated, and pressured to divorce him. shit like that. kinda stuff bushencheney and gonzo would like make more widespread SOP in the halls of Amerikan justice.

rory rambles, spins himself, pins the tail on the inner donkey, and brings you another installment of coulrophobia desensitization training

Perhaps the past foretells the future. Some time ago a presumed member of the sub-species homo redneckus delivered this car to this woodland road that rory rambled on yesterday between forays into swamp, up slippery rocks, and through briar and blueberry, while tracking wildlife to put a tiny jingle in his purse and serve mistress science. In the past this automobile burned fossil fuels and contributed to the invasion and scarring of nature. Then it died. It don't work no more. Nature is reclaiming it. Every day some more molecules leave it. rust forms. taking it back into the elemental form from whence it came. iron was mined in revolutionary times and many years after not far from where this steel hulk lies. sorta like it came home to die. one day, no car will run on this planet. perhaps the past foretells the future.



now that roryz said somethin' 'bout his "purse" in the above passage he realizes that the conditioned minds of modern amerikan folk will wonder, is rory gay? this puts rory in the position of wanting to say fuck yes, I'm gay, because I think gay is okay. if I were gay that'd be fine with me. however, I'm not. now that roryz said that, he thinks to himself, why do you even bother saying that? I am gay. I am not gay. If I were a clown, I could get out of this whole mess as pointed out in my first clown post, because according to Christian Clowning authorites, clowns are "asexual." see for example:



of course if I were a clown, I would shoot myself. point is, if any, why the fuck does anybody care who is gay and what the fuck is wrong with a man carrying a purse? rory has carried a shoulder bag of an outdoorsy type at times and occasionally had a comment that nobody is going to say anything about a guy like rory carrying a purse. well, that ain't true cause saying nobody is gonna say anything is frickin' sayin' something. so one thing rory has to say today is: Gay is okay. another thing: perhaps the past foretells the future.

so during the rambles yesterday, rory sees this beautiful sight. oh what a lucky man i was.



she was so polite. it is a she. a gravid she. she said in her musical, lovely, way, with the tail-tip maraca. "scuse me sir. you scare me. i don't know you. would you please step away a little?" how polite these creatures are. how well mannered. no unnecessary unprovoked attacks disproportionate to the circumstances. no energy wasted. just a clear statement. "please step away. if you try to hurt me, i will try to hurt you, so that you won't hurt me." pretty frickin' reasonable. not very scary really, when you think about it. and how pretty she is even now as her hide grows dull as the time for shedding and re-brightening approaches. reminds me of a conversation rory had with a trucker, who, seeing rory carrying some telltale gear towards the hills above a truck lot, said, "lookin' for snakes?"

rory replied, "yep."
trucker asked, "what kind?"
rory replied, "rattlesnakes."
trucker looked rory over.
rory looked trucker over. trucker was about 6' 2", 'bout 5 inches shorter than rory. trucker weighed 'bout 400 lbs. conservative estimate. shit you not. trucker had an irregular stubble. like he'd shaved parts of his face 'bout two days ago and other parts 'bout a week ago. not in the conventional pattern of any beard, goat, stache, or burns, however. trucker's T-shirt had two arrows on it. one pointing up. one pointing down. between the arrows two lines of words. the top line: "the man." the bottom line: "the legend." it was a "white" shirt with black writing though. not like the example here.

t shirt had what appeard to be coffee, barbecue sauce, and chocolate stains on it. trucker's belly was hanging out below the bottom of the t shirt 'bout 7 or 8 inches. belly was hanging over his belt buckle obscuring it. truckers 5 to 7 remaining teeth were the color toilet bowl porcelain gets to be when the bowl has been filled to the brim with urine and excrement and then left to dessicate in an abandoned service station restroom during an august heat wave. the arrow leading down from the text stating "the legend" pointed directly at his toad-belly-white-buckle-obscurin' -flab-flap. kinda ruined the impact, I would think. wearing a cap. greasy cap. said "hostess cakes" on it.
trucker says to rory, "snakes is disgustin'. I hate snakes. oughtta kill 'em all."
rory says, "see ya." heads up into the hills to work.

meanwhile dead cars rust. people wanna kill snakes that did them no harm. and clowns make balloon animals. what a frickin' world 'tis. judging from the comments made by some of the few readers of this scream into the vast darkness of the internet known as roryshock, roryz loyal binary code buddies are disproportionately coulrophobic. rory hopes you availed yourself of the link to help. please. seek professional help. although what follows may help to desensitize you to clowns so that someday your seeing of even the most hideous shrine or rotary-sponsored clown making the most obscene balloon animals will be as easy as shooting defenseless families in haditha is for marines. desensitization. that's what we're goin' for here. now take a deep breath. and tell yourself. it's only a clown. it's only a balloon. it's only a clown with a balloon. he can't harm you. you are safe.



okay. now breathe. rory knows that was very scary. good job. breathe. in and out. in and out. okay. now look at the next clown image. breathe. that's it. not so scary is it?



[sound of rory screaming in terror!!!!!!!]

whew. guess that desensitization didn't work. wait. it's a news flash. comin' in from kansas senator sam brownback. an anti-internet porn crusader of the first order.



balloon animals. they're disgustin'. oughta kill 'em all.

Call for repression of internet depictions of "balloon animals" bearing no resemblance to any known species baffled rory at first

what the fuck is this guy's problem? rory wondered. so rory decided to check into the issue. hfs, roryz not entirely sure he agrees with the calls for censorship, but at least he knows what the fuckwad in the preceding picture is talking about. some of the results of roryz investigation of internet depictions of what appear to be obscene "balloon animals" follow.

please be advised that coulrophobics should depart this post immediately. roryz pretty sure he frickin' traumatized himself by viewing some of what is to follow. for the strong of stomach, here goes:

Some sort of inappropriate klown kama sutra demonstration? Is the clown about to "hurt" the trouser snake?


Species depicted by this "balloon animal?" White wonder worm? roryz already having bad dreams 'bout this one and he ain't even asleep.


Klown might claim it's a "buccaneer's sword;" however, it bears a striking resemblance to the "black mamba."



Where the fuck is the clown's other hand? Why is he thrusting the red latex dolphin at the viewer? And what the fuck do the rest of the balloons here represent? rory feelz a little queezy lookin' at this.





balloon animals suggestive of acts of copulation are to be outlawed under the proposed legislation:



the next picture is not for the frickin' faint of heart. although roryz a first amendment freak, he has to question whether this goes too far. this one will haunt rory for the rest of his days, rory fearz. should this even be allowed?



maybe this'll help me decide whether to support a complete ban on obscene "balloon animal" depictions on the internet. If you would be so kind, and if you frickin' feel like it, please respond to the rory poll question. Do you find the following image more, less or equally disturbing than the preceding image?



let rory close with a public service announcement. there is help out there for coulrophobics.

disclaimer to any klownz offended: the above is frickin' satire, or somethin' like that. and in roryz OPINION the "balloon animals" in question appear to be obscene.

rory callz for MILLION MOON mass ass baring at spy satellites on june 11th -- spread the frickin' word

howdy friends, immigrants and countrypeople. we all know that bigbro-und-co are trackin' our phone calls. rory, like so many others, has long suspected the fuckwads of watching us from above. figured there's probably some nsa hack sitting in a dark room zoomin' the old satellite in on nude sunbathers and wankin' somewhere in the "control room" in a hollowed out guvmint mountain. turns out there's a whole frickin' agency unto itself. They can look down on your backyard barbie and tell ya what's for dinner. google earth ain't nothin' compared to what these 'wads scope out on a regular basis. one of the most tightly guarded guvmint secrets is the level of resolution available to unkle scam.

who is doin' this shit? It ain't the nsa. not the cia. not the dod. its the nga. that doesn't stand for nitwits golf association. stands for geospatial intelligence agency. at their claptrap ridden site spattered with corporatese nonsense about their "committment" to such things as "excellence" you will learn that they are "committed to Customers both as a National Intelligence and a Combat Support Agency." "Customers?" What the fuck is that about? They spy for the NSA. They spy for the CIA. They provide military intelligence. They are a governmental agency themselves. the fuckin' nsa is their "customer." have they "privatized" themselves? probably so, 'cause they sure as shit sound like a buncha wankers. well, in any frickin' event, you can also read a little 'bout 'em here. Sure, they say they don't spy on individuals. they say don't lookat the little picture. trust us they say. fuck that. roryz rule of thumb with the current guvmint on issues of domestic spying: 1. don't frickin' believe them. 2. whatever they deny doin' they are frickin' doin' with a vengeance. rory became even more convinced that the average shmo is getting scoped when he checked the nga children's section. and found this high dollar guvmint cartoon which is apparently integral to our national defense:


as soon as they start talkin' 'bout keepin' us "safe" and couple that with innocent cartoon characters with big old ass surveilling eyeballs these days, you can be sure they are spyin' on us. yep. thatsa frickin' fact.

Digression: Here at rory shock we're "committed to [frickin'] excellence" as well. committed to excellence. committed to excellence. now tell me that frickin' phrase isn't long since deceased and utterly meaningless. I don't frickin' wanna hear that phrase again until there is a secure mental health facility named "excellence." nuff said 'bout that shit.

back to the point here. rory is calling for a million moon mASS action to protest global surveillance. show the privacy invadin' fuckwads what we think of 'em. mooning has a long and fine tradition as a way of showing defiance, disrespect, and a sense of humor in the face, literally sometimes, of frickin' adversity, absurdity, and assininnity. So let us light up the earth with mirth and buttocks. the next full moon is June 11, @ 1803 Universal Time, according to the u.s. naval gaze-uh-tory. rory calls on naked apes everywhere to moon the sky on june 11. concerted local action is encouraged.



think onnit frendz. if just 1,000,000 asses are bared skyward, we are talking about maybe 200 square miles of ass flesh shining up at the satellites. if your stern is white and bright let it shine the light at night. if it's dark and smooth maybe daytime's right to reveal the groove. it don't matter. be creative. write a message across your ass. shine an ever-lovin' light on your ass. glue sequins on your keester. make a huge illuminated ass effigy. glow in the dark paint yore frickin' caboose. or stick with simply tush. but whatever ya do, let's moon the mofos!!!! june 11. million moon mass ass action. come awn. make it a frickin' moonathon.

a surprising number of citizens are willing to accept the glib lies of the W organization like well-lubricated assholes

According to info in the New York Times today, 5-12-06, the NSA may have been compiling a huge database in an effort to compile a "log of every call ever made" in the u.s. should we worry? rory frickin' thinkz so. these bastards are violating the sacred law of the land: the frickin' bill of rights. last time I checked that was still frickin' the law. but generalissimo-of-spying hayden 'bout to move from the NSA to the CIA says "Everything that NSA does is lawful and very carefully done." wow, the NSA never ever breaks one frickin' law. I did not know that. until hayden told me. should I believe this bald baby-faced word sphincter?





rory agreez. and hayden is a lying shitbag.

and by the frickin' way, generalissimo-of-spying hayden, like most of the lies of the W organization, your lies are frickin' limp. you can barely stuff em into cranial orifi stretched by progaganda. rory thinks he might have to revise the graphic.



I don't know, when the lies are so limp and lame is impossibility a defense to the crime of attempted brain rape?

meanwhile, in the context of new nsa revelations and hayden's appointment, today, a publication known as the Boston Globe reports that "most put security ahead of privacy." and they quote a fuckwadian statement about warrantless guvment privacy invasions that rory is totally frickin' sick of hearing moronically mouthed by people who claim to love freedom so much they don't really want it anymore: 'I have nothing to hide, so I don't have a problem with it. If it's for the security of the country, it's OK with me."

to all who say this shit, rory asks, if you ain't got nothin' to hide, then why the fuck do you wear clothes in the summertime?



and cut out the "its all different since 9/11" cloacal spatter, okay? not everything is different. the twin towers falling did not automatically repeal the constitution. the sun still appears to set in the west. w is still the worst president in history. and guess what, fuckwads who repeat this mantra in the name of shitcanning freedom? giving up your civil liberties does not in fact reduce your statistical chances of getting wasted by a terrorist in the u.s., which by the way are still pretty fucking close to zero. more people died from bad food last year than from terror attacks. actually, more people died from something that has reached epidemic proportions in the u.s. after 9/11 than from terror. know what that frickin' disease is? well rory duz: it's frickin' stupidity. tens of thousands died last year in the u.s. from stupidity of all frickin sorts. now, if the guvment told me they'd abolish stupidity in exchange for me givin' up freedom and a right to some privacy, I'd hafta think on that one.

but these fuckwads who say they favor security over the constitutionally protected right of privacy and that 9/11 scared them so much they no longer believe in the constitution ... 'cause that's what they're really sayin ... rory says you are frickin' cowards. and rory sez anyone who disagrees with that is a frickin' traitor. you're either for the constitution or against it. this is how pathetic you are:



and if you've got nothin' to hide fuckwads, why do you draw your curtains? why do you seal your envelopes? your nothin' to hide talk is cheap. like the statement "freedom isn't free." now there's another one. freedumb without the "free" is just "dumb." freedom may have a cost heavy in blood, sweat and tears, but don't tell us it isn't "free," fuckwads, cause a lot of people are apparently taking that statement a little too frickin' literally.

Finally, this is probably really shitty blogform, but roryz gonna just paste an earlier post right in here, cause it deals with the same shit and I feel like lookin' at it again myself. the news is kinda repeatin' itself, so wtf, rory'll repeatemself too:

✓ 38.2% Surveyed would gladly submit to Rectal searches if President Bush said it would make them safer.

Graphic submitted to Bush administration by private Homeland Security Consultant Reckton Group, Ltd.:



Heard on the Street recently:

Homie Security Cop: Excuse me sir, would you mind if I look in your rectum?
Joe Citizen: Yes Actually I would!
Homie Security Cop: Well, if you have nothing to hide, why would you refuse permission? We are fighting a different kind of enemy and I'm just trying to keep everyone safe and free. You don't object to that do you?
Joe Citizen: Well, since you put it that way, I guess you better have a look.

Tell me it isn't so!

38.2% of American Fast Food Customers would willingly submit to a cavity search if President Bush said it would make them safer from terrorism. A www.roryshock.com person on the street survey revealed this startling statistic recently. 16.8% surveyed had no knowledge or opinion on what a cavity search is, in most instances simply asking "What?" in response to questions. 7% of survey participants made comments related to dental examinations. Secret NSA Director Rear Admiral Charles "Chilito" Numnutz is reported by one of Flyonthewall's operatives to have said, "These numbers are a little disturbing. Apparently people aren't scared enough yet. We need to get a solid majority ready to bend over and spread 'em in the name of freedom." Numnutz did, however, recommend rejection of the above freedom-anus poster design.

The above appeared on www.roryshock.com. A couple weeks later the news broke on CBS and other Crass Media outlets that about half of the American people approve of the President's domestic spying program after listening to his unconvincing blather and propaganda campaign. The good thing is that about half of the people know that he is full of shit, that domestic spying is not making anyone safer, and that W should not determine the meaning of the Constitution, according to what is convenient for him. Nevertheless the number of fascists in government who argue that is precisely what he should be allowed has grown recently.

Media Matters Site has info about these polls and the Crass Media

bush admits to lusting after german chancellor merkel after he "glimpsed her soul"

at first rory was revolted by w's comment that he had a glimpse into the soul of German Chancellor Merkel. then rory starts lookin' into the situation. then rory got really revolted. w and the chancellor are hot for each other. first it was just w lusting after her in his heart. unrequited love at first. but that has changed.


he resorted to his tried and true frat boy humor. liftin the cheek and lettin' go during the solemn proceedings at the american jewish committee meeting (clickitup):



His butt diabolically blossomed with the heat of an afterburner, the sound of ripping canvas, and the stench of exploding roadkill. Chancellor Merkel fights back the vomitus.




delusional fuckwad that he is, w thinks he has scored points with the Chancellor:



but he's wrong. as he usually is.

good god. he thinks to himself, "I see her soul, and I want to fuck her. george w. bush preznit of the u.s. wants to fuck the chancellor of germany."



"oh yes. I see your soul." w has forgotten all about Laura. all about scripture. all about the admonitions against lusting in his little black heart. all about the fundy teachings that thinkin' 'bout it is as much of a sin as doin' it.



he wants her so.



he has a daydream much like the german satirical caricature that he enjoys looking at:



the daydream is so intense in his unbalanced white matter dominated brain that he becomes stuck in this position, like a robot losing power, the result of his rare neurological disorder. have you frickin' noticed his robotic carriage? this was the first time he locked up in public, though. chancellor merkel thought it was kinda cute, his sudden vulnerability. merkel claps her hands to try to snap him out of it.



he doesn't quite snap out of it. he just freezes for a moment in another position. he thinkz, "little georgie, are you there? will you wake finally? little georgie?" as he gazes at his fly.




he remembers better days, when little georgie was more responsive:



meanwhile, back in germany, effigy makers show merkel climbing up bush's ass. now that's effigy making. now that's political commentary:



she doesn't care for it at all.



well then imagine what she thinks of this effigy of her half up the ass of w as uncle sam while waving american flags:



now that's an effin' effigy.

the latest news is that chancellor merkel has invited w to her childhood home in germany. w has accepted. thinkin' he might get lucky. oh he probably will. but the chancellor has her own ideas. oh, yeah, she wants george now, too. but in her own way.

Spring has rory workin' hard, marveling at nature, and for a variety of reasons playin' a little hookey from bloggin'

Hey rory, where 'n' the hell have you been. Well, here's one place. At work:



HFS rory, in the meantime, the wild columbine has frickin' bloomed in the hills:



rory luvz the way a little plant can take hold in a tablespoonful of dirt on a rock (rory remindz you to click these pix up for enjoyment):



I wish I could say I got lost in here for a week:



but I didn't.

I did pause to visit with this guy for a minute or two. Leaving aside the cultural fear and loathing for a moment, isn't he a lovely painting (you gotta click this one up):



and to frickin' think in the meantime, rory missed w's national day of prayer. May 4th was the first fuckwad's day of prayer. rory was wonderin' what the fuck w and his cronies would pray for. it should be forgiveness for being tools of mass destruction. but that sure as shit wasn't gonna happen. so rory checkz the white house site and sees that w said this among other things:

"In the stillness and peace of prayer we surrender our will to God's will, and we learn to serve His eternal purposes. By opening ourselves to God's priorities, our hearts are stirred and we are inspired to action -- to feed the hungry, to reach out to the poor, to bring aid to a widow or to an orphan or to the less fortunate."

the frickin' rhetorical cesspool overfloweth. what a bunch of pious bullcrap unsubstantiated by action. rory can't believe this shit. so rory checkz in with flyonthewall and finds out that w's little prayer meeting was defined by a quiet yet audible fart the boys back at Delta house called the "poison dart" that escaped with near lethal effect from w's intestinal blowgun (click up to size):



But then rory looked more frickin' carefully at what w said. see, he said "a" widow "OR" "an" orphan. That's an either or thing and in the singular. gonna help maybe one widow, or, if not the one widow, then maybe one orphan. And the frickin' poor, well, he didn't say he was gonna do anything but "reach out" to them. Reaching out doesn't do jack shit and takes no effort, just an extension of the arm. Feeding the hungry. Shit, he does that every day when he stuffs food into the first piehole. course he did say he might reach out to the "less fortunate" which in his world would be covered by tax breaks to those only clearing half a million per year. so, it turns out that rory was wrong for thinkin' w was lyin' out his ass when he gave his prayer speech. just had to look a little closer at the floating rhetorical turds to see 'em for what they were.