Friday, May 12, 2006

a surprising number of citizens are willing to accept the glib lies of the W organization like well-lubricated assholes

According to info in the New York Times today, 5-12-06, the NSA may have been compiling a huge database in an effort to compile a "log of every call ever made" in the u.s. should we worry? rory frickin' thinkz so. these bastards are violating the sacred law of the land: the frickin' bill of rights. last time I checked that was still frickin' the law. but generalissimo-of-spying hayden 'bout to move from the NSA to the CIA says "Everything that NSA does is lawful and very carefully done." wow, the NSA never ever breaks one frickin' law. I did not know that. until hayden told me. should I believe this bald baby-faced word sphincter?





rory agreez. and hayden is a lying shitbag.

and by the frickin' way, generalissimo-of-spying hayden, like most of the lies of the W organization, your lies are frickin' limp. you can barely stuff em into cranial orifi stretched by progaganda. rory thinks he might have to revise the graphic.



I don't know, when the lies are so limp and lame is impossibility a defense to the crime of attempted brain rape?

meanwhile, in the context of new nsa revelations and hayden's appointment, today, a publication known as the Boston Globe reports that "most put security ahead of privacy." and they quote a fuckwadian statement about warrantless guvment privacy invasions that rory is totally frickin' sick of hearing moronically mouthed by people who claim to love freedom so much they don't really want it anymore: 'I have nothing to hide, so I don't have a problem with it. If it's for the security of the country, it's OK with me."

to all who say this shit, rory asks, if you ain't got nothin' to hide, then why the fuck do you wear clothes in the summertime?



and cut out the "its all different since 9/11" cloacal spatter, okay? not everything is different. the twin towers falling did not automatically repeal the constitution. the sun still appears to set in the west. w is still the worst president in history. and guess what, fuckwads who repeat this mantra in the name of shitcanning freedom? giving up your civil liberties does not in fact reduce your statistical chances of getting wasted by a terrorist in the u.s., which by the way are still pretty fucking close to zero. more people died from bad food last year than from terror attacks. actually, more people died from something that has reached epidemic proportions in the u.s. after 9/11 than from terror. know what that frickin' disease is? well rory duz: it's frickin' stupidity. tens of thousands died last year in the u.s. from stupidity of all frickin sorts. now, if the guvment told me they'd abolish stupidity in exchange for me givin' up freedom and a right to some privacy, I'd hafta think on that one.

but these fuckwads who say they favor security over the constitutionally protected right of privacy and that 9/11 scared them so much they no longer believe in the constitution ... 'cause that's what they're really sayin ... rory says you are frickin' cowards. and rory sez anyone who disagrees with that is a frickin' traitor. you're either for the constitution or against it. this is how pathetic you are:



and if you've got nothin' to hide fuckwads, why do you draw your curtains? why do you seal your envelopes? your nothin' to hide talk is cheap. like the statement "freedom isn't free." now there's another one. freedumb without the "free" is just "dumb." freedom may have a cost heavy in blood, sweat and tears, but don't tell us it isn't "free," fuckwads, cause a lot of people are apparently taking that statement a little too frickin' literally.

Finally, this is probably really shitty blogform, but roryz gonna just paste an earlier post right in here, cause it deals with the same shit and I feel like lookin' at it again myself. the news is kinda repeatin' itself, so wtf, rory'll repeatemself too:

✓ 38.2% Surveyed would gladly submit to Rectal searches if President Bush said it would make them safer.

Graphic submitted to Bush administration by private Homeland Security Consultant Reckton Group, Ltd.:



Heard on the Street recently:

Homie Security Cop: Excuse me sir, would you mind if I look in your rectum?
Joe Citizen: Yes Actually I would!
Homie Security Cop: Well, if you have nothing to hide, why would you refuse permission? We are fighting a different kind of enemy and I'm just trying to keep everyone safe and free. You don't object to that do you?
Joe Citizen: Well, since you put it that way, I guess you better have a look.

Tell me it isn't so!

38.2% of American Fast Food Customers would willingly submit to a cavity search if President Bush said it would make them safer from terrorism. A www.roryshock.com person on the street survey revealed this startling statistic recently. 16.8% surveyed had no knowledge or opinion on what a cavity search is, in most instances simply asking "What?" in response to questions. 7% of survey participants made comments related to dental examinations. Secret NSA Director Rear Admiral Charles "Chilito" Numnutz is reported by one of Flyonthewall's operatives to have said, "These numbers are a little disturbing. Apparently people aren't scared enough yet. We need to get a solid majority ready to bend over and spread 'em in the name of freedom." Numnutz did, however, recommend rejection of the above freedom-anus poster design.

The above appeared on www.roryshock.com. A couple weeks later the news broke on CBS and other Crass Media outlets that about half of the American people approve of the President's domestic spying program after listening to his unconvincing blather and propaganda campaign. The good thing is that about half of the people know that he is full of shit, that domestic spying is not making anyone safer, and that W should not determine the meaning of the Constitution, according to what is convenient for him. Nevertheless the number of fascists in government who argue that is precisely what he should be allowed has grown recently.

  • Media Matters Site has info about these polls and the Crass Media
  • 18 Comments:

    Anonymous Anonymous said...

    Rory,

    Your posts are so damned good (in most possible ways), that whenever I'm the first to comment, I feel like I used to when I was the first into the peanut butter jar at home: honored, but still felt like I was ruining perfection.

    the "Good Patriot" examination photo whooped. Well, so did gross fetus face.

    I hope your weekend is a 48 hour extension of the gutlaughs you just gave me. Don't stop.

    5:11 PM  
    Blogger Rory Shock said...

    guerillas hey ... your comments honor rory deeply ... truly ... plus you always say cool shit ... i'd forgotten what it felt like to be first into the peanut butter jar as a kid ... thanks for your always good vibes and for the good wishes ...

    5:18 PM  
    Blogger Tina said...

    Rory, you just kill me. I swear, if I'm in a pissy pants mood from any of BushCo's latest crimes, I just visit you and instant laughter ensues.
    That said... your point about the number of people killed from things other than terrorism made me think of something:
    Iraqi president Jalal Talabani said Wednesday: 1,091 were killed due to civil-strife related violence in Baghdad in last month alone. That's a lot of grieving Iraqis - mothers, fathers, children, lovers, friends, cousins, aunts, uncles... It's a hard number to put into context. What would that scale of violence do to the US?

    1.) 9/11 killed 2,986.
    2.) Baghdad has a population of 5,753,612.
    3.) NYC has a population of 8.1 million.
    4.) NYC is almost 2X Baghdad's population, so if Baghdad ALONE is filling up morgues with 1000+ dead per month, it is believable that ALL of Iraq's total dead per month reaches about 2200 dead/ per month. So, that is like having a 9/11 every 5 weeks.

    Imagine the outrage of the Coulter, Hannity, and Neo-Con wingnuts who declared: "We are at war" after 9/11 happened. Imagine how long Americans would tolerate death rates like that on our own soil?
    Not very bloody long, I'm willing to bet.
    BushCo is bending each and every one of us over and putting glass shards on the end of it and America isn't outraged over this. No, no, no. They are outraged over that stupid bald guy on American Idol getting booted off. They are outraged over their American Idol votes not being counted... Not over Diebold not counting their votes. I swear... I love America, but I am ashamed of soooo very many Americans.

    10:01 PM  
    Blogger Unknown said...

    my favorite line from this posting you wonder?

    'should I believe this bald baby-faced word sphincter?'

    how could that NOT be my favorite line?

    you know it IS worth waiting for each and every one of YOUR posts mr shock. delightful (yet sad and frightening as well).

    1:58 AM  
    Blogger sumo said...

    I was amazed at how much he looked like the fetus. Maybe the fetus is Elmer Fudd's fetus...who knew?

    2:13 AM  
    Blogger Rory Shock said...

    tina: your COMMENT is a frickin' great post ... thanks ... rose: thankye ... the guy is indeed an arsehole of the worst kind ... sumo you're correct he is rather fuddian ...

    4:34 AM  
    Blogger gugon said...

    rory, you are the master - funny and scary at the same time. Did you really conduct that survey? Shocking!

    Fascistic governments always begin by convincing the citizens that it's all for their own good. They whittle it away chip by chip until one day people realize there's nothing left - and by then, there's nothing they can do about it.

    We need people like you!

    7:29 AM  
    Blogger pinkfem said...

    And don't you really think those brain rape victims were really asking for it all along? After all, they were showing their brains to their best advantage, tempting and alluring to Hayden. And look what the brain were wearing! Nothing but a cranium.

    9:04 AM  
    Blogger JBlue said...

    I new I had seen that face before! Thanks for clearing that up. It's been bugging me.

    Did you say free dental exams? Where can I sign up? Har.

    I know some people who would submit to rectal searches if the Shrub told them to. Sad.

    Great stuff as usual.

    11:18 AM  
    Blogger JBlue said...

    Um, I "KNEW" it, I meant. Sigh.

    11:18 AM  
    Blogger Unknown said...

    OMG he does look like a baby!! Oh, now I have some WICKED photoshopping ideas... thanks,Rory!

    Incredible post as always. You are beyond entertaining, mister!

    11:38 AM  
    Blogger enigma4ever said...

    Rory- you again have done It...really I was going to say my fav line but Rose beat me to it and then sumo blew me away...Elmer's Fetus....still dying....laughing so hard....


    ( thanks....and please honor us with a Turdblossum Tribute on Monday- you are the Man for the Job)

    Thank you for the Best Saturday Laugh...

    3:54 PM  
    Blogger Graeme said...

    Those morons that say " i ain't got nothing to hide" are obviously not smart enough to live and participate in a democracy

    8:11 PM  
    Blogger pissed off patricia said...

    Now that the public is learning the details of this newest part of the tap story, they aren't as happy as they thought they were.

    5:30 AM  
    Blogger Mark Prime (tpm/Confession Zero) said...

    They can continue to hide their ass as long as they are not in office and dictating the next drop of the bomb or the next plate of food or the fate of mankind! Fuck `em all! Rory, again fine (funny) post, my friend. Glenda, very funny reply! LMAO.

    7:16 AM  
    Blogger Jeremy said...

    I love the brain rape image.

    Honestly, the polling about NSA wiretapping swings wildly based on how the question is asked.

    If you say, "is this ok to do to protect us from terrorists," of course people will support it. If you ask, "is this ok to do while breaking the law," which is obviously the more revelvant way to phrase the question, then most are against it.

    9:57 AM  
    Blogger Kathleen Callon said...

    Oh. You do get the best graphics... even though the chancellor crawling out of his ass is my alltime favorite. Thanks for the laugh. Have a great weekend.

    11:24 AM  
    Blogger PTCruiser said...

    Thanks for getting the brain rape image stuck in my head, Rory. Great post, though.

    3:49 PM  

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