Saturday, August 19, 2006

the most flatulent president in history "rides" again

nope, he's not just a two-fingered monkey chokin' sumbitch. he's also the first gasbag. the most flatulent president in history. if the administration had a band, it'd be Talking Sphincters. clickitup:

dub was responded to the following question at a recent press conference: "Mr. President does your administration have any new initiatives to report to deal with the global warming problem?"

just before the next photo was taken, dub had made an off-the-cuff remark about how he wasn't hearing enough "thank you's" from the Iraqi people, and said, "With all the resources we are pouring into Iraq, they should be thanking us a whole lot more, but they're afraid to thank us because of the Islamic fascists." He then mounted the immobile, gasless Harley and pretended to ride. pretty frickin' symbolic, rory would say. but who the fuck would've thought that he'd add his own motor noises to the sillyass spectacle?

at least when the prime minister of japan lip-syncs it's to elvis and he doesn't use his nether mouth. what a frickin' cutup el presidente is, though.

dub sure-as-shit luvz ta play pretend. here he saws the air and makes sawing noises. notice the immaculate work gloves. every time you see a photo of the sumbitch working take a look at the brand-spankin' new work gloves that haven't even got a bit o dirt on em and haven't even taken on the form of real human handz at all. like cartoon character gluvz. make-believe man. like a kid with a toy tool belt. but at the same time the photo is symbolic of the larger dub again. makin' believe with his little saw. but causing death around him. look at the felled plant life around him. why? because he likes to "clear brush." why does he need to fucking "clear brush." he is clearing brush for the sake of clearing brush. recreational brush clearing. what a fuckwad. course somewhere in the convolutions of the pea in the first noggin' he has begun to believe that "clearing brush" is manly. like mounting a Harley, even if it ain't goin' anywhere. here is the manly man playing air saw.

by the frickin' way, that cycle image causes rory to recall that danger is just out the back door even when dub mounts a frickin' non-motorized two-wheeler and lets one rip:

roryshock: Bush Indicted On Wanglingo for Reckless Bicycling: privilege to Operate Wheeled Vehicles Suspended for Ramming Policeman


Blogger enigma4ever said... first ? wowoweee quite an honor...another great post honoring yet another of the King's skills...talents? Birth defect? drinking aftereffects? form of do kill me Rory..BTW you have to go read SUMO"s post about the Judge ( friday's post).Have a great Weekend...

7:04 PM  
Anonymous Libby said...

I think he clears brush because Rove told him if he was very good and worked hard he'd turn into a real boy, just like Pinnochio.

8:12 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Bush may be a "make-believe man" who learned the PR value of clearing brush from acting-prez Reagan (the original make-believe prez), but his flatulence HAS to be for real. How else to explain his Earth Day bike ride through The Calif Redwoods when all his flack were ordered to stay 200-ft behind "so he could commune with nature"? My theory is for that hilly terrain, he had pre-measured optimum range for residual up/downdraft effect. Or forced one of those same flack to measure for him, the sadistic pervert.

And (gasp) "his nether mouth", rory?!? Oh, I gotta remember that! D.K.

9:10 PM  
Blogger enigma4ever said... I didn't sleep up early and went back to the blogs that made me laugh last night...and sure enough the comments here are rich too...DK was right "nether mouth"....

( Okay Rory I sent you over to SUMO- because...when i read her post I kept thinking , I wonder???? does King Fucktard have such the office....AIrforce one...I could not help myself...bethca he does...yup.)

3:39 AM  
Blogger Peacechick Mary said...

Not only the spanking new work gloves, but always with the presidential seal on the work suit. You made me laugh again. Old fart mouth Bush!

4:13 AM  
Blogger JBlue said...

How much brush can there be? He's been at it for 6 years, man!


Hey, I was thinking of you when I wrote a recent post called RUN AWAY! I guess because your fave preznit plays a starring role....

11:00 AM  
Blogger sumo said...

Yeah...I'm still working off the nether mouth...that's a good one R. I have been busy cleaning my pond and clearing the 'brush' in it. My water suit went south on me so I got in with the goldfish just about nekkid. Now, I'd like to see ol' fart bottom get in a pond and mix it up with the sea creatures...and without gloves. That's right...I did the manly thing in the pond with the fish and wrestled those suckers all over the nets for me. I feel the testosterone level up a bit...I may need to get a specimen cup for myself afterall. Maybe the Dub is onto something. But...I don't do the gas thing...sorry, I won't.

1:02 PM  
Blogger DivaJood said...

and what is wrong with a good fart? Some people consider farting a sign of good manners. Nobody I know but what the hell.

First time visit to RoryShock, and I get fart jokes. Omygod.

1:22 PM  
Blogger GraemeAnfinson said...

Sweet. clearing brush and farting. i laughed at this post, but then I got really depressed thinking this is the most powerful man in the world

11:35 PM  
Blogger pissed off patricia said...

Wonder if he performed his magical talent when he was in Germany at the pig roast? He grossed everyone out in every other way.

12:18 PM  
Anonymous karena said...

I knew a frat boy who would fart and then play all dumb about it, like someone else did it. Farting publicly is a form of control, usually reserved for those who have no real control. I am thoroughly convinced, after reading this post, that he is the most fartenest President ever! Thanks for confirming a deep seated suspicion, something just didn't smell right.

8:42 PM  
Blogger glenda said...

a manly man playing air saw...cracking me up again... that is code in Texas for "I'm not gay."

1:29 PM  
Blogger gugon said...

LOL! Rory, I needed a good laugh this morning and there you were. Thank you!

5:58 AM  
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2:16 AM  
Blogger dursun celik said...

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12:25 AM  

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