effigies 'r' us to open chain stores in india -- demand for bush related effigy supplies predicted to stay strong through 4th quarter

why not start with an arguably irrelevant, arguably relevant image of a part of a rory collage, currently titled something like "War, uh, how frickin' silly it is, good god, in the grand scheme of cosmic time." by the way, the circular thingies are a medium used by rory that rory has yet to meet another using so if you know someone who does use the medium put 'em in touch with rory ... uh, the medium is ... aspirin. yep aspirin. because war gives rory a frickin' headache. and an aspirin painted with rory's special aspirin painting technique (classes forming for the year 2020) relieves the headache just a tad somefrickin'times.


remember when bush was in india and speechifyin' about all the opportunities for north american small business that globalization and the rise of an indian consumer class would bring? over in india w said: "Americans who come to this country will see Indian consumers buying McCurry Meals from McDonald's, home appliances from Whirlpool." that's a frickin direct quote
somewhere else w made a comment essentially saying "american worker, you may have lost your job to outsourcing, globalization, corporations willing to export production to the slave rather than import the slave to production, but heck, there gonna be a lot of opportunities to sell american shit to people in india." somewhere the first fuckwad pretty much said that. rory thought to himself. well, there's nothin' really made here to sell there ... because it's cheaper to make it there and more profitible to sell it here. so, what the fuck is he talkin' about? but then rory stops worryin' and starts thinkin'. well, he is the first fuckwad, after all. an' he says that those who have been fucked economically here should think about entruhprunurin' over in india. so rory starts thinkin' sommore. what izit that would sell over there that we could make over here. then rory realizes the answer is simple: effigies. effigies are big in india. but most of them look pretty shitty. everybody loves a good effigy, but nobody seems to love 'em as much as the indians. they like to burn bush. they like to burn pretty much anything that pisses 'em off. but take a look at the sorry ass type of effigy they are willing to work with. this one is bush:



from an earlier rory post (don't forget to clickitup):




then rory startz to thinkin' sommore. this is a market willing to accept really shoddy merchandize. frickin' captalist's dream. really shoddy and flammable merchandize. and in india, pissed off people get stoked burning just about anything. here'a an onion burning in effigy to protest onion prices goin' up:



rory gives this one a decent rating. it's an indian politician. look at the happiness in the faces in the crowd. effigy making is a feel good industry. the effigypruhnewer can make statements like a disney frickin' exec: we're imagineers, smile-merchants, catharsis-capitalists. hfs:



the finest work I've seen thus far has been from bhopal, where union carbide massacred many and left a legacy of horror, an early example of globalization at its finest. here a crowd carries union carbide ceo warren anderson to his fiery fate. still, one could criticize the abe lincolnesque semi-stovepip hat. still, anachronistic garb can tweak the brain in an interesting way:



in the UK, people avail themselves of mass-produced masks. this demonstrates that type of technology that can easily be adapted to enable high-quality effigy production by even those lacking time, artistic skills, and substantial funding, while allowing a substantial profit for the effigypruhnewer:



this bush effigy in prague isn't the best likeness, but it demonstrates the application of rudimentary puppet technology, which market research suggests would sell well in india if price can be kept low:



people like large effigies. here's an example of a large, lightweight effigy (bush being toppled in trafalgar square) which includes the ever-popular phallic missile motif:



in addition to being a fine example of phallic use of the missile, the above photo shows that toppling can be as satisfying as burning to a crowd.

this is meant to be a strangelovean donald rumsfeld riding a phallic munition:



the following effigy by hezbollah erected near the fatimah gate suggests that phallic use of missiles in conjunction with effigies has universal appeal. thus, marketers targeting india will want to include easy to use phallic munition options in a variety of shapes, sizes and colors to add profit.



granted, the hezbollah effigy is of a more two dimensional variety, but the photographic reproduction of bush's visage is excellent. storage and stealth issues would suggest that the effigy retailer would be wise to stock both two and three dimensional effigies and accessories. but rory gives it fairly high markz as far as bush effigies go. you can almost hear the effigy saying:

"I'm a war president.  I make decisions here in the Oval Office in foreign-policy matters with war on my mind.  Again, I wish it wasn't true, but it is true.  And the American people need to know they got a president who sees the world the way it is.  And I see dangers that exist, and it's important for us to deal with them."
the famous I'm a war president interview

the creators of this effigy might be engaged as designers for the high-end market:



the above could have been entered in international competition and had a reasonable chance of winning a prize. there has already been a best bush effigy contest in iran. again, effigy marketers and contest promoters take note.

rory sez: the effigy industry's gonna be bigger than McCurry. why the american middle class will frickin' rise again on the greenbacks of burning bushes. the war president? hell, he's the opportunity president, I guess, the way he's opening up those new markets in india. and speakin' of McCurry, recall this image, which demonstrates that those offended by McCurrization are going to be another fertile market for ready-made effigies:




finally, for some reason, rory leaves you with another arguably relevant arguably irrelevant image from a rory collage: